You guys might think I'm weird for this.
Tonight at Oasis (CU's BCM worship service), the speaker told us to turn to Joshua 5:12. He continued to speak about this verse (in a very different way than it hit me, but still awesome).
I, however, couldn't listen after I read the verse. Joshua 5:10-12 talks about the people of Israel FINALLY getting out of the promised land and into Canaan after the walls fell. Verses 11- 12 say,
I personally think back to the summer after my senior year. It was all I could do to get out of bed sometimes. I was heartbroken and wounded in ways I had never been before. I didn't trust anyone with my pain. Except the Lord, who faithfully and tenderly spoke love over me. This was Love, this was the Lord, in a way I had never known Him before.
The amazing thing about God is how He works in our times of wilderness, in our times of complete reliance on Him. Oh, Lord, thank you for your faithfulness!
The thing is, the Lord always brings us through the wilderness season. He brings us through to His glory and with His power. And then the manna ends. The every day miracle ends. Not that He isn't there, not that He isn't just as faithful. But His presence is so close, so tender in those wilderness times where we come to the end of ourselves. In the promised land, we lose sight of the everyday miracle we had been waking up to. We forget about our manna.
Oh, my heart aches when I think about it. It truly does. I feel like Moses in Exodus 33, when the Lord says He will give the Israelites land but will not go there with him. Moses says that God could give them everything, but without His presence, "everything" would never ever be worth it.
Lord, let me never forget about Your manna in my life. Let me never forget Your faithfulness and loving tenderness and mercy and grace. Give me wilderness if it means I will not forget. Let me glorify You in every season, wilderness or promised land. I love you, because You love me so compassionately. Amen.